uh-POS-truh-flahy – sounds exactly like the pest that it is

A rogue apostrophe that shows up absolutely everywhere, planted with the breezy confidence of a person who never questions their own judgement, in places that did not ask for it, and in words that did not need it. Causes loss of intelligence in everyone who sees it.

It is attracted to the letter “S”, like a hou’sefly is attracted to garbage. It lands wherever it want’s. On plural’s. Occa’sionally in the middle of word’s. In-between two letter’s that are now embarras’sed to be seen together.

Usage

“This menu is a cloud of apostroflies. I counted six in one sentence. Six.”
“I don’t know who needs to hear this, but ‘avocado’s’ is an apostrofly infestation in a single word.”
“Her TikTok’s title was so riddled with apostroflies I had to go outside and touch grass in order to calm down.”

Related: greengrocer’s apostrophe (the apostrofly’s more specialized, slightly posher cousin); comma splice (different pest, same energy); unnecessary quotation marks (the apostrofly’s chaotic sibling, equally uninvited, equally everywhere).
Note: You cannot correct an apostrofly in the wild. You will be told you are a “grammar nazi” or dismissed with “everyone knows what I mean”. The fly does not care. The fly will never care.